SINGAPORE: In a show of vulnerability, a working mother turned to other working parents in Singapore to ask how they manage to go through the motions of their work lives while being parents all without losing themselves.

The mother took to social media on Monday (March 10) to share what her day-to-day looks like, explaining that on workdays, she spends an hour commuting. “My kid goes to childcare, but I try to leave work on the dot to reach home and spend a couple of hours with him before his bedtime,” she shared.

However, she also added her sentiments on leaving work on time: “I finish things on schedule and haven’t received any complaints. But I just feel like I’m going to be penalised in terms of career progression. My team has other working parents too, but they’re all male (not sure if that makes a difference), and they regularly work until around 7 p.m. After work, I also see them sending out emails.”

The working mother also shared how she tries to make time for herself as well. “After my kid sleeps, I spend some time on my skincare, shower, then check work emails and scroll or watch something for half an hour before I turn in for the night,” she wrote. “I definitely don’t have the bandwidth to continue working. I try to sleep early because my kid still wakes up at night sometimes. Then it’s wake up and repeat the next day till Friday.”

She admitted feeling pulled in different directions. “It’s not that I don’t like working—I do—but I love my child more. I constantly feel guilty when I’m not there during the day to pick him up, feed him dinner, etc,” she explained. “On weekends, I devote my entire time to him, except an hour on Saturday and Sunday each for a workout. I put off doing for myself—like buying new shoes even though my old ones are tattered, decorating my new home, organising my stuff, and even getting a haircut. I love my child with all of my heart, but on some days it just feels like I’m struggling to thrive.”

The mother also acknowledged that not losing all of her pregnancy weight is another stressor, but she rewards herself with good food on weekends. She then turned to other Singaporeans in the forum who could share some insights with her. “Does anyone else feel the same way? Like you have kind of lost yourself even though you gained the best thing ever (your kid and family)? Like you can never be a good parent and do wel...