SINGAPORE – From a distance, they look like any other friend group. Three women in their 30s and 40s, catching up over a cup of tea. They move with an easy intimacy, trading inside jokes, taking wefies, teasing one another. 

But they did not meet at work or school or in the typical social settings where friendships solidify. In fact, if not for the dissolution of their respective marriages, their paths might never have crossed.

It was a January 2024 open call by local community platform Crane that brought them together. The social club had sought an “empathetic leader to build a supportive group for navigating the emotional roller coaster” of divorce. 

The eldest of the three who stepped forward was Ms Kellyn Tan, 45, a financial adviser and mother of two, who left an “abusive” marriage in 2020 after 13 years. She teamed up with Ms Ang Li Tin, a 44-year-old divorcee who works in marketing, and designer Elena Cheong, 36, then in the process of finalising her divorce. 

The trio, who named their support group Begin Again, organised their first session in March 2024. Since then, it has swelled to more than 30 members, as has the scope of its activities. The group consists mostly of Chinese professionals in their 30s to 50s, with women making up about 70 per cent of members.

They meet to go to the movies or to rock climb. There are dinner parties, hosted at Ms Ang’s home, as well as workshops covering a swathe of topics from travelling solo to legal advice.  

Informal and intimate, a group for divorcees by divorcees – that is what the founders say sets them apart from the other support groups out there.

Recalls Ms Tan of the support group she attended on the recommendation of a Ministry of Social and Family Development counsellor: “It was very mechanical. They asked typical counsellor questions, but at that stage, you aren’t always in the right frame of mind for self-reflection. What’s missing isn’t actually the advice; it’s the community.” 

And what community provides is perspective. 

“Sometimes, you think your problems are very big, but then you hear that other people have experienced the same thing and realise it’s not that bad,” says Ms Ang. 

Ms Tan adds: “Look at us, we’ve been through the fire and survived. So, our message to participants is that you’re going to make it through whatever you’re facing now, and come out ...